Let’s start the new year with a blog post.
Note that I didn’t say, let’s start the New Year with resolutions. The reason for this, is that in some dictionaries, the definition of the word resolution is “the act of solving or ending a problem or difficulty”. To my mind, this often relates to something of which we have total control (eg “I will limit my evening takeaways to once a month”). Many of you will be facing challenges, like me, around which there is uncertainty. We cannot control how fast a condition will change, either by deteriorating or improving. The drawback in making the resolution “I will do a 2km walk every day“ is that this relies on a health level remaining stable, not breaking a leg, weather, all things over which we cannot guarantee. We cannot stop some of the circumstances in which we find ourselves - but we do have control over other things.
A friend of mine recently posted on Facebook, asking people to write one positive word starting with the first letter of their name. Words such as caring, rocking, kindness, magic, joy, and connected, were some which came up. I find this to be a very good approach to the New Year. All of these words point towards our actions, and our reactions to situations. A person chooses whether to show these traits, and this does not have to rely on the events around us. It is more about a focus on the way in which we act, and react to the situations, rather than the situation itself.
(As an aside, I remember that I received my diagnosis one morning back in 2013, and was back at work that afternoon. Later, a work colleague heard this and said, “Wow - I would have been in bed crying for a week!”. My thought was, “Why? That wouldn’t have changed anything”. Both reactions are valid - see my earlier blog on The Stages of Grief.)
Now, I don’t feel that I am anyone special. I’m a wife and mother, I go to work, I help my children through their teenage years, I have hobbies - all things which I imagine average Joe does all the time too. Yet regularly, I get called “amazing”, “inspirational”, “strong”, and there is even an MS Nurse who refers to me as a unicorn. I’m hoping that this is a reference to being magical and unique!! 😂 Sitting back and looking at this objectively, these words seem to be how people view my reactions to situations.
I’m not saying that we should all wear painted smiles all day every day - it is important to acknowledge reality, but there’s no harm in also looking at our mindset. The gym is for people wanting to work on their body - unicorn resolutions can be for those wanting to work on their well-being. And as with the gym, if you skip a day or two, it’s not a biggie.
So what are you going to choose for your 2019 resolutions?